ATOMIC BLONDE: Better Than Hipster

Sure, listening to a Charlize Theron Dead Pan scenario is trendy. Fine! Whoopee! Fulfill the male fantasy! (And be yourself) Barely polite and so institutionally burlesque as a conspiracy of negation in retroactive plan to be caught incensed. Sure, that could mean Dead Pan, (Hisper) but then again so could repulsed rejection...

It really depends on the audience...

Thing...

Clown...

Fake experience that is pleasurable. Trendy. Trendy? Trendy.

This film screams rape joke corrected; it screams killing joke corrected
as pure normal cynicism of freedom to censor. (Honesty)

1) New greatest one take ever. (Sorry Redford; G_d)

2) Words like 'clandestine officer,' meet concepts like Trust No One, while

exposing themselves as people who, 'Can read a fucking map,' lying over the

dead who make and respect and retort and recognize allusions to Niccolo Machiavelli,

including a miraculous bad-guy escape mirrored by the un-likely heroine of a film that

actually calls Fascists Communists.

So...

McAvoy the Earth. Theron the sky. When the photography is action, the action is photography, and in the case of Charlize Theron that means, it seems, mostly everything, delivering a pitch perfect and very realistic female Action star with, yes, the above.

JUSTICE LEAGUE : Lightspeed Planetary Jedi Mind Meld (Yes)

No movie really deserves to be pirated!

That is an untruth.

...

Still, Ben Affleck and co. of the much heralded sequel to a powerful

How Green Is My Valley stereotype that moved not nothing but an awesome

mountain of just 70's Superman - that's all - sky rocketed as

an earthly fugue of some super-heroes that know what the privacy means

to super. A devasting Iron Man 3 of a film. (That makes people cry)

Inside joke.

People like MacBeth.

5 Stars.

It takes MacBeth to solve the problems with an expert acting studio master

class from none-other than modern Conan. (Jason Momoa)

'And the Oscar doesn't go to,' Wonderwoman or the Flash - honorable mention -

or Ben Affleck for being probable literal glue - but to the actor taking stones as Victor Stone who

is really the actor Ray Fisher. (A much needed definite archetype in the American struggle to be free

as such a bleeping robot that bleeps anything, anywhere, anytime, anywhere, however, whatever,

whenever anywhere with a solid Gold heart)

Like this movie with a couple of casual curse words dropped. Zach Snyder directed this picture.

So yeah. Maybe the legit winner of reigning best picture, because it

seems so regular in what is sure to be something Army Hammer. (Early warning Masthead of a

Wonder Woman owner of a Batman culture of the cult of Millennial Superman the Flash tip) {So,

woa.} Supernaturally emotional.

IRON SKY : The All Cap's Destruction

Timo Restarauntatationanthonasparta did the classical. (Director) He does. He blew it up like a baloon, effing. (Nuff' said)

Well done, Timo.

People will complain of racism for the commercial as ice trailer that was obviously to hit those that need it the most like my blank and my late, lost blank. 

Anyway, back to the cult classic of Nazism.

The Nazi religion that is still illegal in the mainland of count 'em, France, Germany and Poland, of the eurocentric digging contention of constellation British anti-Semiticism is well said in all ways and down to all the smash cutting. (There's a smash cut)

Please note, the above illegality is sorta 'dated.'

The film is rhetorically brash as horror. It is an elegant satire with all its hallmarks. What it may lack in sarcasm analogically, it makes up in spades in action sequence and also with irony.

Duly noted.

It's a sarcastic play that gets ironic in a hurry and this writer sees no reason why Timo's braves aren't changing the world viewer to viewer, audience to audience and for the better.

Bravo.

It's 5 star film that is a 3 star heavy-weight. Stay for the ending. 3 stars of absolute cinematic perfection. And cudos for losing the 2 from tired Hollywood Thriller. 3 stars. A classic.

Okay, maybe four. A classic that is cult.

ANT-MAN: A Dangerous Movie

As if it’s not enough that this film actually suggests that shrinking in size and keeping your density is a super-power, it actually suggests it’s great and great enough to super deal in super problems like Nuclear power.

I guess. But that’s not all. Oh no. The word martyr is actually used and underscores the entire lengthy 40 minute first act as a sort-of positive and the reason why a shlub may become a super hero.

Within the overall context, sure.

But within this blog’s sober lens, it pains me to say that Marvel had the audacity to make its best picture to date. It’s a great A-: like a 94 or something. Worrying.

Democracy is well represented as, first, fist-fighting between elites and then pantomimed violence between the imprisoned. This is life. And shows how firing happens.

Ugh, right?

Ugh. All the glitzy stuff is couched in said Democracy and the lying and plutocracy of the day-to-day robber-baron tech. world that we are in are well delivered without exaggeration.

Double ugh.

And what’s more, there’s a newspaper and said martyr is found because of landing therein.

Potentially triple ugh.

This film is dangerous. Montage is used repeatedly very, very well. For these messages? TRIPLE-UGHAGE ENGAGED!

Loyalty is underlined and in the pint-sized, but all the forbidden fruit everywhere doesn’t necessarily preclude the message of childhood loyalty from withering with repeated watchings.

It’s a step-parent world. (And a cop) {Saving grace.} [But see the problem?

Fourth ugh!

The short second act leads us to question why the female love-interest isn’t the super-hero. Perhaps she’s not a dodgy martyr that’ll ruin Nuclear diplomacy for fear that the science is too potentially harmful to the planet. Still. In a step-partent world, fifth ugh!

The unshaven super-hero is born, and though this is reality and cool to see in an Axel-F superhero movie with cool friends who risk everything for a score slash mission, it is worth repeating that this movie is dangerous.

The overall structure of long, montage-riddled, first act, short second act with superior helper friend, to 3rd act of the mission calling to 4th act of the mission to 5th act of the one-to-one fight with the baddie who has a voice to rival the evil of Ultron: the overall structure which ends in the power of Zen or Nihilism is so strong as to make this movie really, really dangerous.

The Zen-ending is not trivialized and underscores the power of private ownership. Both its saving grace and another ugh as the orphan in question will, never, ever truly get the plot to life. But, the zen-hero has a Master’s in Electrical Engineering and can do things like beat security at really, really impressive… Shell companies.

So good luck. We loved it.

MAD MAX: FURY ROAD : A Colon Of A Picture

Voice Over? No! Voice Over about Voice Overs? No! 1 that leads to demise? No! Voice over through demise? No! And one that begins with Nuclear War as to why, this is why no!

The crane was going the wrong way. Oh.

Titles used to be better and sell soap, but like Charlize Africa allegedly said: (allegedly) the world is toxic.

Under poeticized and overly musical is another way of showing this, but who's sharing, as always with good affects from Charlize Africa at Twitter backslash backslash she's African.

Believing in Valhallah and under-explaning from the orphaned of the world like life is suicide? Having a good death is sharing. Beautiful landscape. Sharing: "I live; I die; I live again." Not dying the hard way. The easy way. Living. Living Hyacinth fighting with Imperators leads to jobs that could be physically confusing.

And there's beautiful cutting to Gibson, Mel Gibson, which may be the hardest thing in the world and a way of scoring these points, humbling as a humble picture. Very Western. Filing. Ends too early? Life is like that. Hard life breaking water; statement movie; totally un-watchable; action; must-have; road-trip in Hell to Hellless with Heller. Yes, 2 many hate this world hating themselves, and it's killing us all. Get it out and the use the pinky gun instead.

Chick flick? Whimpering Willow of a Green Capital scam that should have worked better maybe. Not a chick flick. Not really. Expensive world war won.

AVENGERS : CIVIL WAR: A High A-

For once an Avengers movie started with a short film and moved to a mission to get things rolling the traditional ways. This film was one of them. (Thankfully)

Sad to say there is a standard 911 joke buried in the first act which is expected to get a laugh. Laughing is encouraged, because there is a move to the 4th 911 reference early in the picture.

Fuck everbody.

Yeah. This is a picture. It’s a solid A- with Africa proudly proffering the idea that Black Panther is your worst nightmare; the one with all the Iron Man. (Black Panther)

Spiderman has what may be the first realistic New York accent both in present day and in reality; New York is a monster, but at least the writing is good for Parker. Parker is Parker, and that’s what’s important. Small probably with a tall girlfriend.

On a side note, Captain America is watching MSNBC and the Scarlet Witch continues to be awesome with an awesome Vision Scarlet Witch scene which is thing.

The opening mission is awesome.

And it’s awesome to seen a Psych. van going nowhere fast, playing second fiddle to Blue, because that’s the future.

Certain problems from Winter Soldier continue like please tell us to what extent is Cap. invinsible and like asphalt and can punch metal. Considering that Vietnam was so successful as to remember Korea and Desert Storm in both directions in the space-time continuum, which, though it is riddled with Stinger Missiles in the 80’s, still takes Iraq and Afganistan to get Terrorists to take on people with no body-armor by choice. (Ipso Facto Vietnam) Considering that Vietnam was so successful, playing Cap. and other Super Soldiers as miniature Hulks is just how its gonna be.

Avengers? Good sound sleeper cell movie with several exciting plots and plot structures. It doesn’t have to start in the middle of a mission since the story is usually what is evil doing. (Not the Avengers)

Okay. Sarcasm off. The Scarlet Witch is hot. There is a nuclear drone. But this isn’t Batman ruled by Superman. This is the Avengers. It’s too bad people care this much. The second greatest running scene behind Superman and the train is in this film. (Super Soldiers)

CAPTAIN AMERICA: WINTER SOLDIER : Michelle Obama Writes

This Captain America movie is a Blockbuster despite being half a Billion short at the boxoffice. A lot was going on. The Ukraine was only just starting to blow up. All that. As usual for the Americans it was covered. The film ends with a mention of Kiev.

The point is this movie is better than it seems. We know. So what went wrong? Well a lot. It started like an Avenger movie instead of a Captain America one to start with. Or not or the opposite! Let’s begin.

It should have started in a gale.

So the movie did begin with dialogue between Black Widow (yes! and Cap. What? Problem? It didn’t? Seeing the magnetism of the shield? Physics? Skip? Yes. The intro. of Falcon would then double the Red Herring potentially and make some stirring Soapbox stuff really sing in the modern era, adding lots of suspense.

The writing is racist. N.J. Fury dies amid well done play-acting and then we see Two black cops in the mis-en-scene. I mean come on! His Punisher III scene is undercut by the fact that he’s driving a Stark O.S!

Not that the film is flawed; it’s not quality. Don’t trust anyone, etc. are all in there; it’s just like Michelle Obama was writing and didn’t want to overwhelm any perpetually overwhelmed orphans! Waiting for vicarious to ever, ever become visceral only happens in the movies!

Un-triple-forunately, the film is required, because its about how to fly a False Flag which is part of the State Apparatus. Plus, the French, read Algerian, are the baddies because of the stealing of the bomb and that’s why there are no flying Aircraft Carriers, etc. Plus, it’s a good peak into living life as a spook which is a good way to make it.

But no. The bad Romanov performance does not save the flaw of opening with the wrong scene as the suspense is broken. However, Scarlet Johanson joins Lilly Sobieski in best performance of a sociopath. (Her’s legal: Sobieski’s 88 minutes)

If the first scene was like the second or third, we could say Falcon is the winner for best socio. path, which he is, but now we can’t. But required.

Chris Evans shoulderless, smiless, Cap. gives an awesome Hydra speech and Anarchy begins.

So there is stuff; it’s just they needed a bit more Luthor colon, colon, colon title performance, colon, performance artist, colon, title bath of wetworks about how war!

AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON: You're Playing Yourself

Yes, this column is not perfect. Yes. It is most unwise and makes a mockery of either stuff that is for children or of itself by failing in its singular mission. Please to notice that making a mockery of kids’ stuff is not the problem. In and of itself it is tireless, tireless work. Evidently, not so with the Avengers!

Sure, does Age of Ultron or Avengers Two, yet another comic book movie with titular issues involving a colon, deliver? Absolutely. Thor is very Thor. Robert Downey Jr. plays a piano, so, you know, he is Tony. Everyone’s great. The whole cast sings and whoever thinks he’s directing a comic book of a script does a good job keeping the whole story with stories moving.

But honestly, is there a 4th act? Is there? Steve Rodgers we learn in the erstwhile 4th act is the super soldier who can rip apart choppable wood with his bare hands. So he can keep an Iridium or Admantium huge robot who chops off limbs if only by mistake, he can keep it busy with just a fist fight, because he’s a super boner?

Granted. Cary Granted that Chris Evans is huge. But please. This director sucks. He even made it look believable, and I’m supposed to take it with a grain of salt because the robot expressed remorse over hacking off a limp on accident and is a robot with issues? Please. THEY'RE ANGER ISSUES!

So, in closing, the robot wants to use the Avengers to drop a city-sized meteor and maybe that’s why, which is a loserish, loserish robot and does that seem realistic? NO.

So despite cool lines making anyone political look deep into themselves, you’re playing yourselves Marvel and you played the boxoffice passing this off as a Billion Dollar movie! No. Justice League: Batman versus Superman is not even in the same hemisphere.

B+/A- which is like an 89.5 in English. So try next time in English.

DOCTOR NOH: The Short Indie Student Film

AHH, Once Big Band then Drumming a people Dancing to anything but Big Band travel to the Dutch India Company behind the Dutch East India Company portents of Reagan and Racial War. (A thing young working Caucasian men with Families! (4) Communicating and inventing nothing! (Fascinating) Rooms of racial harmony older dying men With viral young women without families Gaming in games With easy odds even Lighter than Poker.

Tipping.

So that we don't have a Service Industry of gangs. An Inner Sanctum on a flirtatious gender Equality With a Single Woman who is Barren on Caucasian.

M.

(Ham) Newspaper time instead of Notes from Brown University Ivy League of laying Dead Pirates francelondon Haminventions from Caucasians! Ham-made stuff! Resumes! English Rapping Ray Partea Spygames travel famous Moviestars amid jealous, loser T.Vstars. A world without Sunglasses! (Only for the American; only Americans are casual Capitalism From Other WorkingMen With Families (4) Feint Accents From places that now sing kill the white people Jitsu From Brazil madeof Global Warming!

Things that kill. Messages. Fear. Children. Busy. Inventing! Police State! Arabia! The best! Communictionor that ends With violence! Back! In the days, When people wore suits because the planet wasn't cooking With hair-spray, clubs Where men don't Drink to spectator sports but the people in News, people who are successful without Social Media. Breaking Bread! Without Voodoo! Back! When Voodoo was Voodoo. (Not hebonics) Never hebonics, manly men with Female eyewear.

''You mean we're fighting the same war.'' - Hawaii 5.O, the Truth! Back! When rape was Teley and Teley, it was considered rude to take pictures of people. Back! Before there was repression you'll all be sorry! You! Rats! When everyone. Even Africans. Working for Big China. When Luck happened and people shook hands. Back. When. Camera. Men didn't the camera into the Sun! When. Bad people asked, 'Y.'

Where people drank Russian Vodka amid Teadrinkers from Argentina where men could accuse the likely story. When. Men had feelings to treat Trash like Trash and Check for love the only way they knew how. When. Evil. People. Behaved badly. When. Good. Guys waited and could show up even late. When. America was the land of the.

''I think they were on their way to a funeral.''

''Can assure you my intentions are strictly honorable.''

- When there was Fresh Water. - When Detective wasn't on iPhone. - When revenge was the part. - When Actions Movies NEVER went without tipping the cap. - Nanny State. - Open racism.

''World Domination that same old dream.''

Dinner With the Evil Genius and no action-movie without Ocean! Ad. Nuclear Power. And a little, itisy bitsy Madonna making a mix tape and NEVEREVER doing Nothing especially fearful in the childrens.

Maria.

MISSION IMPOSSIBLE ROGUE NATION : Barely Legal

A lot of things are wrong with this movie. Tom Cruise is the Sade Adu of movie stars and this movie flies by at like exactly 2 hours and would be called an amateur piece of like 4 stunts with a chase scene that actually works. So if you want to admit you watch or listen to Sade on fast forward - be my guest wrong. Jeremy Renner, for example. He's wrong. Or somebody's wrong and he's making sure that he is wrong which is a banking reference called Stone Wall which is, is wrong at least as wrong as this: epoch. Alex Baldwin. He's being a reclusive Democrat. That's wrong. Rebecca Ferguson in deep cover as a Swede who's a Brit that is a Swede. THE COMING WRONG!

Ving Rhames playing the sax. Wrong, wrong, wrong! It's Jeremy Renner as the trumpet of sax everytime.

And the guy responsible for that Johnny Depp movie without Angelina Jolie. (Please don't mention that to Johnny as - if he's being funny he'll ask why people keep saying that and if he's musical - the other Johnny Depp) Anyway, wrong! The writer of the Usual Suspects and the guy responsible for the first Jack Reacher - no comment - somehow maneuvered a Skydance, Alibaba, Bad Robot movie without really invoking John Woo at all - just ask Tom Cruise - wrong, wrong, wrong!

The bad guy is the best bad guy ever. (Psst - wrong)

And humor is used expertly to forward the Ethan Hunt live-wire myth that is wrong as a Gen X'er and not a Gen Y'er which - wrong - does not even even exist.

Actual events are mentioned and that is wrong and might incite violence and some how it happens.

So yeah. J.J. Mindmeld Abrams, who finessed killing Harrison Ford, robbed us of an excited Aryan soldier in the future and rebooted Star Trek with - yes - a child driving a hover craft who is hated by the President of the United States - wrong - gets to live another day as Hollywood wunderkind of Survivor 90's fame just because he's worked with Tom Sade Adu Jet Lee Cruise with a masterpiece of action movie that is now more economical on the writing/production front as a seemless Ben Barnes piece of Ben Barnes. Which is wrong! Mission Impossible 6 is rumored already on IMDb with the Swede, Cruise and Renner already banking... With no greatest bad guy ever. (Sean Harris)

Certain things that you think screw up the action - in retrospect - are perfect to the reason why this bad guy is the best bad guy ever. (Which actually is wrong cause the viewing experience is less emotional WRONG

0 is more expensive than 1 and looking into the camera is wrong Mission Impossible Rogue Nation. Wrong. It's barely legal and the world sprouted legs under a Swede, which, I might add is wrong like if you're an editor stealing the writer's writing because you think they're a hostage to Conservative Arabs and can't write about Ted 2 without getting his credit took.

So you want to see a standalone that actually is known as Mission Impossible 5 where the bad guy is clearly Tom Cruise Generation Netflix... BE MY GUEST!

TED 2: 40 Virgins And No Virgin

Sure. Fine. High brow. ... Dirty South!

Amanda Seyfried is not a b.s-artist, a con artist, a wuss who can't indelibly and remarkably perform the mimesis of a perfectly worthy and innocently talented porn star from probably the 70s that some people couldn't get to know because they didn't want to truck with... a golem.

And now that Seyfried has admitted with a talking bear and everything that she is one, we can all agree she is the Tom Cruise of porn stars if not one her own dawn self although in this one she admits to be being from a major State school with a rep the size of girl's from Sessex - who are cool and let you know when you can invoke their memory. (Seriously - there is no stigma)

There is an evocative use of boobies in a truly choreographed meat market of nerd-dom which is as hard as acting with animals or children, so it's a quality picture if one that errantly is solely made to make Amanda Siegfried somehow qualified to sing and dance with a character actress and whatever.

Ted 1, the more accurately named Ted, supposedly had a poor delivered 9/11 joke, and it might be worth watching that one first except that Ted 2 has a whole bit of being sucky at improv helper time yelling Robin Williams at comics in shit so funny I lost it crying which the kid or girlfriends should probably take part in because it'll age them beyond their years spiritually.

We await Ted 3 which'll hopefully move on from trying to save a slutty actress - golem - whatever and actually have artistic merit and the balls to call it Teddies or at least A Teddy.

But if that gets in the way of Wahlberg self-producing The Newsroom in Boston if it must be, then burn the accurate bra and end this Cold War and bullshit called most of the evening news in international - if your international - if you eat in the drink... Go fuck yourself.

BATMAN V SUPERMAN: DAWN OF JUSTICE: No Period The Technical Masterpiece

SPOILER ALERT: Time Travel will be mentioned and for that I am invoking all caps at times and in mid-text so that you all get HOW AWKWARD THIS ALL IS.

Plus, I hate colon films.

PLUS being a technical masterpiece isn't exactly being a masterpiece. That's the moral of the story. The next line YES is and that's the end of the story FOR if the writing was WEATHER PERMITTING SO TO SPEAK and saying, ''That's the beginning of the story,'' then the thing would be A COMIC BOOK

This isn't a book. And the figurative, ''THIS,''  isn't a comic book. SO the end.

THEREFORE HENCE, the all important question OF is this film better or worse than Pacific Rim which really is a gentleman's B+ and surely should be known as an A- but for the math rep. seeps with a few off-color choices to bleed comedy from a gem, it is, unfortunately, the same because I cannot get over the beginning of the film which is easily as annoying as the How Green Is Your Valley BEGINNING. (The greatest film ever made)

So it's a technical masterpiece you say. I say that yeah it is FOR IT IS WRITTEN it is probably the greatest undercover A- in the history of time and really a fake A with the teacher being like if you keep this up and get your math cred back, then okay you who thinks I have potentially the most pretentious degree in the history of time INCLUDING DEGREES IN TIME TRAVEL WHICH TRUST ME DO EXIST TECHNICALLY.

And now a moment of silence for the misfortunate title of this film.

There.

SO look.

Was Batman v Superman Dawn of Justice worth showing to the kids? GOD yes and start with especially this if the kid needs to learn patience and understanding and like teaching yourself those things constantly instead of trying to do that to others BECAUSE THERE IS TIME TRAVEL.

Batman, Ben Affleck, takes over the D.C. directing position from the director who moves to Executive Producer of every major D.C. release in the near future. Everyone complained. It didn't make a Billion Dollars. 

Then it did, because better film really can't be made, but you have to sit through the B.S. MARVEL HEAVEN'S GATE VERSION of what is a Marvel intro to get that as someone that hasn't seen Man of Steel the O.M.G. standing, flying Jesus H. Christ awesome which doesn't need to be repeated to be refrained.

STAR TREK: INTO DARKNESS : For Love of Tom Cruise!

Watched Jan. 1, 2015, Star Trek is a Sky Dance is Tom Cruise: mis(sTEAK)!

Few franchises can survive the white heat of Tom Cruise and Sky Dance,
you're short film? I. Don't. Think So! (The intro)

Yeah. The film is obviously about Acqua Vit. (Sky Dance you're a Climate Change Sposoon)

Blue floating ghostwriter Jack Malinowski did predict a Polish Oscar nomination in 2014. You're a Scandanavian joke, Sky Dance! (Somehow you failed not to telegraph your name: Tom Cruise)

The Intro! (Which Star Wars really must have)

Grey and White and hidden Yellow reveries of Chocolate Tom Cruise allow the Star Trek mastery of Hello to be, ''It's miracle,'' ''There are no such things,'' to be! To be a list of finely defined camo - yeah. Most people new this movie would be about Acqua Vit and there's Tom Cruise is Flash Light camo harping on Superman and Reeves and this 4Robin Brit Robin4!

Wind 2 is totally going to be under arrest! (And Tom Cruise is currently, publically gaining a studio)

 ''No ship shall go down without her Captain.'' (Right again!

The story begins. (Nice) Good music choices. (Mr. Cruise) My copy contained: ''Call me back.'' Clearly withheld in post you dreadnaught 2 times the size and 3 times the speed, Mr. Cruise.

This Brit Sherlock Robin4 Holmes 4Robin is so Khan. You should make him Khan and then bring back the Ausie. (Tom Cruise owner of SkyDance)

Oh, Simon Pegg. Totally!

''Whereon upon I will freeze die and explode.''

'''''Woe, woe, woe this dead is very we,'' and so on you said remotely, son.'''

(You like them, Mr. Cruise, they mean paraphrase)

Chekov... Put on a red sweter... Is the plot.

Adult content of humor quite brilliant with a fag and Ahura.

Klingon displayed as the overlord - correct... Still for children... Curious children... Playing games... with trillions... So Klingon as Norsemen!!! (Tom Sky Dance Crusie wrote that %100) (Sic.

Still, page 60 is still too page 15, Mr. Ruise! (Sic.

Khan. Scottie. Scottie. Khan. (Duh)

So you see Mr. Cruise we all have blind spots.

Reviewing Star Trek is a mortal sin. My opinion. What do you think?

''Kyle.'' Wrong, I am back in reincarnation exactly as foretold. (Working for Jack Malinowski)
Traitor? Mutinous? Christian as a Rabin? In French: province! (Glowing Blue Eyed Klingons)
GLOWING BLUE EYED KLINGONS GLOWING BLUE EYED KLINGONS
IS
   HOW
            YOU
                    TALK
                             WITH
                                       TOM sky dance CRUISE

ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE GREEN EYES AT THE MOST (i actually do work for Jack Malinowski and arabs so back off)

Yes. As predicted: nice snake. (The remastered  Sky Dance portfolio of mis-STEAK) {The short film.}

Warp wash music and flat light... (More J.J. Abrams is wearing stupid clothing in the wrong Scout mob)

Bones magnificent... Carl Urban is the stuff. Renegades does include fine, blue steel...(40 Love) Game. Set. Match. Tom Cruise re-christened U2 the X-Ambassadors OFSPAIN!(Sky Dance you fop and cheater)

: ) Native Son NYC = 0 )

Let us guess together that this was called... Wind Too... (The movie)

Planetoid getting marked as Mr Chekov Did You Ruin My Ship? (Nice)

Yes 4 is unlucky Mr Cruise.

Though your Jack Reacher may be the most perfect bit of alchemy perfected on the flat round screen... lkasjd;fkln w
r g
wf asp

My name is Kyle.

''I watched you open fire on a room of unarmed Star Fleet officers.'' (Polish Mistake)

''Punch it''

So this is how you kept...

''If you think you're safe at warp, your wrong.'' (Told you so)

The Title Shot is mine and ours Tom Cruise. I work for Jack Malinowski!

So all in all. This movie is Korean perfection. Except the uniforms at the end. (Korea has shitty procreation rate is bunch of men in tights)

B+ and worse than Pacific Rim.

SALT : A Charlie Rose Chiwetel Ejiofor Explosion

Previously withheld from Eternal External
(September of International Release)

 
''Yet another blacksploitation film from the Americans at least features Africans this time around.

In this effort, the common troupe of the Russian double agent posing as a British actor is coupled with the master of intrigue - the international Phoenician.

It might be said that a limited array of quay-hugging Phoenicians adds diversity to the Black on White realism Americans so often claim to dominate. However, not since John Singleton's 'Shaft,' has there been such a missed opportunity for an Arab to step to the fore and speak some peace to take the occidental plot out of yet another exhibit of martial-arts-envy. On the other hand, 'Salt,' does succeed in evoking 'Men In Black,'s 'Man in Black.'

The hero who shoots to kill only at Blond girls, because they read manuals is finally fingered as an autonomous and self-governing agent with his own helicopter who doesn't mind shooting into a crowd to bag whitey. 

This is truly a momentous day of existentialism for the American cinema. Moreover, the 'Man in Black,' is equipped with a brain scanning veracity machine which means he may not have to spare any array of nude, teeth bearing extra-terrestrials, because he will suddenly read incisored behavior as wrongful.

Still, 'Salt,'s 'Man in Black,' seems boorishly, thuggishly, and insularly nonArab for personifying such an obviously African - American institution as National Security.

Drawing a firearm to shoot bullets into a crowd of capitalists in the states would cause reprisal the world over even if it might not get any unusual suspects canned. Which is not in keeping with NSA protocol. You see, the world needs capitalists to keep buying, to keep pushing the frontiers of addition and other theoretical math-ematics. If the NSA character was more Arab - perhaps he might warn the valuable bystanders before firing into their midst because capitalists are a rare commodity too.

By acting like a capitalist, the NSA sentinel might further his end goal of national security while creating the illusion of an accountable government job and thus hold multiple pensions.

Obviously, Ms. Jolie did not realize complete control of this project because the film exhibits institutionalized unprofessional behavior that condones rampant unaffirmed action like a monopoly on the institution of racism.''

MISSION IMPOSSIBLE 3: Trek Wars The Making

Yes. In Hollywood, as in all lands of white water, black ink is quite dry. Such is life with directors! Actors know this. Private citizens? Why sort of. Directors comes with an s. Just like Mission Impossible 3, which supposedly was directed by a young man who runs Television since the Millenium turned during the Survivor series, the invigorated Star Trek film series and, now, Disney's Star Wars.

No. Wait. George Lucus? Not included! Bill Gates? (He's hard to escape) {There is a Solo movie.} [Anyway, as you can see... the writer of Top Gun... Tom Cruise... is now directing.]

 Which is probably why Mission Impossible 3 is a masterpiece. Gone is John H or No H Wu's slow motion and 90s invasive close ups for the Oil revolution of beepers, mobile phones that shall be called cells and P.R., P.R., P.R.! Hello, the talent, the plot the and evil, sinister practice of post-911 geo-political powerplays.

Philip Seymour Hoffman is evil!

Tom Cruise? Well, basically, but he makes a great case for why most of the time it pays to be.

Jonathan Rhys Meyers - the British John Travolata - is in this movieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Kerri Russel the brains? Kerri Russel is the brains!

Ving Rhames? Is in this movie which is all about team-work, timing and, something that really doesn't happen anymore in Main Stream Boxoffice: a rigorously performed script about timing, timing and even more timing until it becomes so uncomfortable that you, and you alone the obvious writer and director of this master-piece of Tom Cruise-approved cinema suggest that you are, like, living in a movie - like.

So Larry Fishburne is the picture. The guy behind the guy behind the guy? Yeah, well, that might also be Billy Crudup! Bam!

Is the hokiness gone from this series that frankly gets to be put it anywhere, because Americans know better than anybody when serious stuff gets corny and besides the point and that, by and large, most Shadenfreude practitioners are awkward - somewhere - and that unfortunately rubs off.

So this is a good review. There are only a few on this blog so shoot me!

Are all Tom Cruise movies truly great? (Yes)

366
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THE EDGE OF TOMORROW : Time Travel Is Time Consuming

Sometimes Americans really aren't allowed around. Not so much with a Tom Cruise movie. Especially one directed by Brown man Doug Liman.

Liman's a great director who's touched everything from the love song of Brad Pitt - the hardest man in show business - to Swingers. (About California transplants sifting through the glory of serial monogamy) {It's the best!}

The Edge of Tomorrow really is a masterpiece that hits hard in the gut and reminds you that Americans, perhaps, do have a point that time-travel is possible if, say, they can convince you that a meeting of species can confuse God, the Universe profoundly.

If a new species shares its lighting concept of everything in such a way as to confuse, perfectly, the Universe itself by coincidentally mind melding a brain that shares time and space but not God as all the aforementioned things perfectly with one that resists it in a uniquely spiritual and, perhaps, lucky - way - then maybe God will play the battle of wits out in his immense test-tube without, presumably, so many inter-planetary meetings as to wreck God's plan? (He'd have to reconfigure matter)

Comparing time-travel to the immensity of the Universe through the miracle of shared lighting - brain - certainly changes things, and it is all shared wonderfully in Jack Malinowski's beautifully ironic 2012 Blogger novella The Lightspeed Documentary. (He pays my ransom money to free me to watch flat-screens in color that speak English so I have to mention that)

The Edge of Tomorrow is a 2014 movie.

Inter-species mind melding that bends space to such an extent as to commodify time it-self was already broached by the 2013 Pacific Rim. (I don't know if Jack Malinowski owns the rites, he only pays for me to be freed to do this and nothing else)

The point is The Edge of Tomorrow really is a masterpiece.

It's too bad Tom Cruise doesn't vividly explain cross-species mind meld as a way to endanger the Universes contiguity and promote reconfiguration of all matter somewhere perfectly to simulate time-travel. He probably could. Tom Cruise's a good man who does good things like star in and produce movies and fund successful churches in Europe. (Which is truly difficult) The whole movie calls for an adult relationship to science and a hive, military mentality to the truth.

Emily Blunt does explain that Tom Cruise is a good man in the movie by saying so. Perhaps she does this because they share a faith in particle physics which is a science so grandiose it caused me to curse, ''Not another Time Travel movie! That's impossible!''

But Emily Blunt and Tom Cruise's share a respect for a science so profound they'll kill each other just to stay alive and further another time-traveling mission, which doesn't sound so stupid once it's basically explained as a meeting of minds from a dominant new mind with a new dominant hive and therefore a new God and a new organic reality that is related to metal and yet not quite a master of it like humans. So there!

War is hell. Hell might also be a slippery slope going ever so slowly backwards in time from the last thing you couldn't accomplish. But it's probably being banished to a terrible planet by an all-powerful God once having lost to an ugly alien. So we must fight to be harmoniously replaceable and invisible like robots so that unlike robots we may time-travel!

Americans are incredibly scientific and a little bit faithful to their ability to get a possible one on one relationship with God - the definitive creator - and - so far - it's hard to disprove. The Edge of Tomorrow is so bad-ass it could be an entire G.I. Joe comic-book of the future.

MAN OF STEEL : A Technical Kevin Costner Film

No matter what hatred comic book and D.C. and fans of decorum and the well-told story might have for the Henry Cavill franchise due to his association with the director of the Christian Bale Batman franchise that broke rules of story-telling and marketing to rouse the sensitive and vengeful, Henry Cavill puts in a respectful and commanding Superman performance; rest assured.

The director Zack Synder was encumbered with some of the same marketing issues that angered Batman fans in 2012 as the same Christopher Nolan production team that gave Bruce Wayne a nuclear helicopter sowed doubt into the very fabric of Superman by mishandling the reveal of Superman's super-strong suit and cape.

Breath easy. The cape is alien made and strong. (Like the suit)

Anyway, technically, this is a Kevin Costner film, so all haters should reserve judgement of the holy relic of Superman until they have watched the movie.(Unlike with basically all other movies)

The film is philosophically quite sound and action-packed. 

For people disenchanted with the idea of yet another coming-of-age story of yet another superhero, please understand that Zack Snyder did direct Watchmen by replicating the graphic novel and so should be at least considered with a modicum of respect by all fans of story. Superman is all about coming-of-age as the main character is an alien and thus every story recounts this fact sorta irrespective of whatever you think about the USA, children or animals featured in movies, J.J. Abrams, J.J. Abrams directing Star Trek and Star Wars, like, back - to - back or tickle-down-economics. (For that matter)

Also, Zack Snyder makes the fair point that Superman, raised in a Christian value system of forgiveness and self-restraint, never quite got to realize his potential as a mass-bending world-beater.

Good point.

The tragedy is palpable. 

300 RISE OF AN EMPIRE : 40,000 English Years

Simon Duggan's arrogant attempt to sink 3D with his glaucoma project is only eclipsed by the Legendary mastery of an NC-17 drum that failed to mute the Victorian death mask and ultimate irony of the little clown that could: Ms. Eva Green - star.

At least Quintin Tarantino is dying softly someplace failing to predict mass cinematic violence with botched script writing.

Zach Synder deserves credit for ramping up to Greek on Greek violence with an elegantly manifold monologue of sight and sound as an assistant script writer to secessionist Frank Miller.

Should the butcher of Superman fail to address the Paeleopenesian war in such a careful battle of the bulge, Frank Miller will surely speak with a received pronunciation for the end of time.

40,000 English Years is a story for the young and old and for children of all ages who need to hear what Russian music sounds like without the infernal bagpipes. And in addition, fornication has never been so eloquently distilled as one woman's choice to bear arms. So this film is religious. 

Like the other other movie nobody wanted to watch in 2013, Terminator 5 her lone survivor is the fall of the decadent empire of artists that believe they are actors and so die poorly convincing little audience of their mortality.

Kids, not all baddies wear claws as a hat and willfully commit the multi-nation-state sin of Greek antidisestablishmentterrainism like Tarsem Singh or screw-up demi-god like the rock Alex Rodriguez, but if Zach Synder isn't careful, Jack Malinowski's 'Versus,' will never happen and the Paeleopenesian War will never successfully happen door to door body to body.

There is enough rigorous philosophy and historically accurate application of magic proved in forged molten metal in real time to back up the annoying trailer of a little dead Greek artist and the ironically sarcastic smirk of Lady Liberty the French Hungarian Spartan Gorgeous.

Let Frank Miller remind us all of the people of sarcasm – when ironic – deadly – when sarcastic -forever.

40,000 English years of the miracle of the British Empire of Sticks awaits the third installment of the Balkan flag of Buysanteuhm: black, purple in a streaking sun...

CAPTAIN PHILLIPS : Predator 18

There comes a time, a time to make the world a better place, for peace, for peace and the whole world human race!

Something like that goes something pretty good like that if it comes from the Thermal Nuclear Detonator the Predator from the great March 18 holiday the sacred 18th of the Church of Carrie Fisher blogger masonary that is at once ubiquituous and secret and out to get the cities that they built. (Or says the first Celtic Slavic droner Barrack Obama)

Anyway,

The pirates Pawel Malaszynski, Marcin Dorocinski, and Eliza Recembel are thin and Muslim and black so black that they are not in the red and don't even need to read the only black and white sandpainting from Tibet about a Nuclear Promise to find out what the four seasons is and how much it costs to stay there like unhappy people. (The rest of us)

The hero is one of the last ethnic Massholes in all of the Ukraine. (Much like one of the pirate leaders, 'Kuba.')

'Nuff said, he flies the flag fantastic – Greek, Uruguay and yes, yes the Stars and Stripes of Star Spangled Banner fame.

Too bad he can't defend trillions of dollars worth of peace-keeping sustenance called your life and times with a little honest killing.

Instead, he has to club Navy Seals to push the impossible and still deadly Paul Robeson to defeat his own industrial designs with military force like a good pupil of the Italian master as the still orbit and good UFO Divici. (Leonardo) {Over 500 and still – yes – without fangs.} [Predator]

So little has to be said and much has to be done to make living worth living so that the famous Masshole people may continue to live their proud life of ethnically unversified lonely people of non-Louisana, non-Chicago, non-Dixie, the non-Texas of non-New York, New York the non-Atlantic and never even Californian the ignoramus fibber of lost accentation like Liberty Island the so on.

SO

The Predator 18 lives killer fear, because the nurse is a Louisiana dyke and blows up the calm general Predator with her Germanic episode. (A monumental film of epoch proportions that shall stand now and forever a blockbuster despite your insistence that pirates have guns and Predators - ninjas)

EXPENDABLES 2 : Conventional Microwaves

Not even the most expensive movie in the history of TV movie blockbusters, Clear History, (Or Rumor Has It 2) can touch the equal opportunity employment motivational pizazz of Expendables 2.

Yes, Larry David continues to redefine damage control after decades of Woody Allen intolerance, but, at the end of the day, Larry really kills nobody.

Not so with Expendables 2. These heroes don't use bombs and they're not above wrecking others with their personal property to prove it.

These heroes believe in conventional warfare and the first-strike capabilities of detterence and definitely definitely speak English as a second language as well as they speak English as a first language.

But Expendables 2 is more than a blockbuster -it's a carefully constructed Atombomb of movie – it's a performance art movie – and totally fit for the mute, subtitled censorship of bar and gym TV screens everywhere since it features – more than anything else – forced nonchallance and the greatest performance artists of performed nonchallance in the microwave era.

Which means, through its awkwardness, it would be a great replacement for most of network news programming, commemorating the death of honor and the beginning of lies in the industry of lies – first strike conventional warfare.

So yeah, Expendables 2 represents the death kneel of the cult classic as the full-on Hollywood protest flick and really marks the first time Americans have ridiculed the vanity of speech-acts in the mobile nuclear era since Denzel Washington screwed everyone in the Meg Ryan classic, 'Courage Under Fire.'

Why do you think Dolph Lundgren gets a laugh?

Perhaps no other piece of performance art has captured the overall borishness of the self-publishing age. We live in a post-karate world where the foot to the face needs Scott Adkins and a knife and a diet to really impress anyone anymore now that Mixed Martial Arts has proven that grapling rules.

Simon West masterfully delivers... performance art... as a blockbuster... that is cult... to the globe... as a message... to the stars... that insures a continuation of what will surely be known as the cult American franchise of the past in the future!

Revenge is personal and if people think that hard men are bad for spreading evil to live in the world, they might consider that they are the energy crisis they claim to be fighting by taking anything before the lives of those green revolutionaries of the Nukes that spread this pronoun fusion in politics, microwarves, Fukushimakon!